Television

Dispatches from the Dissertation, Part 5

Today, I had my second meeting with my advisor to discuss my first draft of my chapter. Across the two meetings, he gave me a lot of questions and angles to consider as I continue to revise the chapter and as I work toward the second chapter. He also asked me about my process, which was, I think, just curiosity on his part, but I liked being able to talk about it a bit. It’s a really long draft, longer than I’d intended, and I’d expected him to tell me to cut something. But actually, he wants me to expand one of the parts.

So.

There’s that.

Haha.

More than most other things I’ve written in graduate school, I feel like the dissertation that has a really vague shape to me. I’m the type of person that often looks at samples when I’m writing something I’m unfamiliar with, but dissertations are all over the place and non-specific in terms of what they’re supposed to be doing (at least from what I’ve seen). As a result, I’d told my advisor that I wasn’t sure what it was supposed to be, and he said, in reference to the draft, “It looks like a dissertation chapter,” which is to say, that even though I have things to work on, I’m apparently on the right track. I have a couple other streams via which I’m getting feedback, so it’ll be interesting to see what other people see/think, but I’m glad to know that I’m in the correct vicinity.

So the way I have my schedule laid out for the rest of the semester is to continue researching for the chapter two as I’ve been doing for the past couple weeks while also doing some revision of the first chapter on one day per week. My advisor said I could wait until I finished a draft of chapter two before going back to chapter one, but I don’t think my brain will allow it lol.

Speaking of chapter two, this is what I’m wrapped up in right now:

Beverly Hills, 90210 cast photo

Oh Scott…

So unlike some of the other series I’m writing about, I’ve watched this series in its entirety on more than one occasion (shout out to FX). But I last watched it circa 2003. And wow, I have a lot of things to say about this show now like STEVE SANDERS IS THE WORST. My advisor told me that the process of doing chapter one would make certain things stand out more easily in subsequent chapters, and I think that’s definitely right. And I feel like going into actually writing this second chapter, I have better sense of what it can/should be.

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Dispatches from the Dissertation, Part 4

Just a few moments ago, I sent my advisor my first full chapter draft (along w/ a message containing several concerns that I have about it haha). Remember how I was talking about my ever-changing deadline before? Well, this last go-’round, I set it for the end of Fall Break, and I actually made it this time. Huzzah! I know that there’s still a long road ahead with this, but I’m glad to have gotten past one particular hurdle, and I’m (almost) ready to start tackling the next one.

In other news, it’s approximately the middle of the semester. My students had midterms/essays due last week, which means I have a nice chunk of grading on my desk. Part of why I really wanted to get this draft done is so I can focus on that. I hate feeling like I’m shortchanging students, and I always want to try to get work back to them as soon as possible, especially if they have more things to turn in.

(Because what’s the point of feedback if a person doesn’t have it in enough time to actually use it?)

This balancing act is tricky, but I think my already embedded practice of scheduling my life in grad school helps. Back when I taught middle school, there were definitely times where I let the prep and grading bowl me over. There are so many ways in which, even with a degree in English Ed, I wasn’t ready yet. I was exhausted on the daily and not making the progress I wanted/needed to make. I’m better equipped now, thankfully. I just wish I could go back in time and help out 24 year old Jacinta.

(Though that’d likely throw off the time-space continuum, which is probably not a good idea)

A picture of the doctor from Back to the Future

#WritingLife

Dispatches from the Dissertation, Part 2

It’s been a little bit over a month since my last update, and where am I now?

Well, I’m inching closer to being able to have a full first draft of Chapter One, but I’m not there yet. When I first charted out my schedule for the summer a few months ago, I’d hoped to have the draft done by August 1st. I realized about halfway through the summer that that probably wouldn’t happen, so I’ve recaliberated the schedule accordingly. On one hand, I’m a little bit annoyed about not having met the goal I set, but on the other, I’m not really trying to dwell on that. I just want to keep it moving. I do think I’ll have a draft in a few weeks, which will dovetail into the beginning of the school year (more on that momentarily).

Remember how I was researching Beauty and the Beast(s) before? Now I’m on Battlestar Galactica(s). I’d never watched them previously (I know, I know), but I’m a big ol’ nerd (I think I’m actually becoming more nerdy as I get older haha), so this is right in my wheelhouse.

Incidentally, now that folks know I’m working on remakes, I get tags from friends every time there’s new articles about them (#MyBrand). Shout out to y’all for helping with my research!

(I’m not adding anymore shows than what I already have allotted though. Because if I did, at the rate remakes are being churned out, I’d never finish.)

As the semester looms closer, I’ve been thinking more about how I’ll try to stay productive at this stage. I’m completely done with course work, and I’m past all of the various checkboxes except the dissertation itself. There are things that I’ve been doing for years now, such as scheduling everything on my Google Calendar, that I think will continue to be helpful going forward. And I’ve been setting goals for daily writing that I’ve been able to meet fairly well. But I also wanted to see if adding something else into the mix would be helpful. So I got a Passion Planner. It’s been years since I’ve had a real planner, but I used them all throughout high school and undergrad. Though I do rely heavily on GCal, I think that using both will both help to remind of what’s coming up as well as force me to be intentional in thinking about and planning for the tasks that are ahead. I looked at a lot of different planners before I made my purchase, but I really like how the Passion Planner encourages you to identify goals, break them up into smaller tasks, and embed those tasks into your schedule.

Speaking of schedules, I found out I’m teaching Intro to Film this fall. At my university, the way this works is there’s a prof who does the lecture two days a week, and the grad students teach discussion sections one day a week. I’ve taught this class before, and I’m looking forward to doing it again with some definite tweaks to what I did previously. It’s a little bit wild to think about since it hasn’t been that long since I last taught the class, but I know my pedagogical beliefs and goals have changed significantly since then. I do find it a bit strange to teach this way though because I’ve almost always been the Instructor of Record. One perk with this arrangement is that I have to do a lot less planning, and I grade less often, which should be a good thing as I continue to work on the dissertation. But when I do have to grade, it’s a lot more papers because we’re given more students in this arrangement, and I never feel like I have enough time with the students since I only get them once a week. Tradeoffs. Nevertheless, it’s a film class, and there are few things I enjoy more than being able to talk to students about film, TV, and pop culture, so it should be a good time 🙂

Dispatches from the Dissertation, Part 1

It’s officially been a month since I started working on my dissertation, and things are chugging along about as well as could be expected. I’ve had to tweak my research schedule a few times as I try to sort out the best times in which I can be productive, and luckily, I’ve been able to manage that without getting majorly burned out (so far).

One thing I changed was the expectation to write for a couple hours each day. I’m still writing on each day that I’m doing research, but I’ve found that the writing I’m doing right now generally comes pouring out in 15-30 minute bursts. I’m not editing any of the writing right now, which is saving me all sorts of stress I’m sure (haha), and only a portion of it will likely be useful in the actual chapter. But I’ve got almost 7000 words thus far, and I feel like I’m setting myself up for a pretty good starting place when I switch to just writing in a few weeks.

Last week, I had my first major breakthrough(?) moment in the process. I was just writing the same way I had been for weeks when an idea poured out of me that I hadn’t considered previously. I’ve been thinking about that idea for days now, and it makes so much sense to me, but I’m not sure I would have necessarily thought of it if I hadn’t been writing so freely. But now I think it’s going to be a significant element of my first chapter. It actually kinda excited me, which is a thing that I’m hoping happens more often in this writing process.

Remember how I was watching the 1980s Beauty and the Beast when I last posted? Well, now I’m watching this:

Beauty and the Beast 2012 image

The CW brand is strong in this one.

You might notice that the “Beast” looks less…well…beast-y. This one of many changes that occurs in the remake that produces interesting results. Unlike most of the other shows I’m writing about, I’d never watched either of these before, so while I knew they were in the vein of what I wanted to consider, I didn’t know where they would take me. But so far? So good.

Dissertation Baby Steps

Thus far, I’ve primarily used this space for writing about my teaching, and while that’s likely to remain the overall focus, the semester ended a few weeks ago. I’m not currently teaching. Rather than let the blog languish for the summer (which is a sure recipe for forgetting about it entirely haha), I’m instead going to try to write at least a few blog posts about what I’m working on this summer, which is, of course, the dissertation.

Corey Matthews, running and screaming, as he was often prone to doing.

Boy Meets World is a gift.

My prospectus for my dissertation was actually approved just before Spring Break, but I knew myself well enough to know that diving into the project at the end of the semester was probably not the best life choice. So I waited until I was done with all of the end of semester tasks as well as done with an institute that I worked for after the semester was over.

And now, here I am. I started working at the beginning of this week. I’d spent a lot of time prior to this week reading through various blogs, books, and social media posts that provide guidance on the dissertation process. I’ve never been a scout, but I’m nothing if not one who attempts to be prepared. As is always the case, some of the advice is in conflict, not only with my personal style, but also with other existing advice. But I’m often still willing to give things a shot, such as when I spent the first part of this year getting up earlier, so that I could get into writing, more or less as the first thing in my day (I maintained this for a while, and the logic of it is very clear, but I don’t think I’m well-suited to sustain it).

So here are the main things I’ve been doing thus far:

  • I made a general timeline for how long it’ll take me to complete the dissertation, broken down by how long I intend to spend on each section. Once I started doing this, I realized that it’s more complicated than I had expected, but I tried to account for as much as I could, and I made sure there was plenty of leeway time for when I presumably get burned out and for revisions and such. My goal is to finish before (*DJ Khaled voice*) THEY stop giving me money, so ya know, planning ahead is important.
  • I made a schedule for the summer with planned viewing/writing/research times. This is something that I’ve been doing for a couple of years now, but I think it’s even more crucial this summer, so that I actually stay on task.
  • I’ve been starting each day before I begin work with a short freewrite on my plans for the day, how I’m progressing, how I’m feeling, etc. I believe this was a tip I picked up from Joan Bolker’s Writing Your Dissertation in Fifteen Minutes a Day. So far, I like this because it makes me pause and think, and I also return and add more after I’m finished for the day because, ya know, reflection is useful.
  • I’ve been “writing the dissertation” every day. For approximately 30 mins-1 hour. With no editing or revision, and with minimal sense of organization. I know that a lot of what I’m writing right now will probably not be usable in the final chapter draft (or even the first real draft), but it’s been useful to get things written down.

I’ve already tweaked some of the details a few times this week. For example, I modified the time I allotted to writing once I got a sense of how that was working for me after a few days. I made changes to some of the questions I was trying to answer in my research when I realized that some of them are unanswerable at this point in the process. I believe in flexibility, especially in a process like this. If something’s not working for you, and it’s something you can reasonably change, then I say, “change it.”

So that’s the gist of where I am right now. Mostly (extremely cautiously) optimistic. Ultimately, I’m getting to research and write about a topic that I really enjoy, which is pretty awesome.

(The topic is TV remakes)

(No, I did not watch that Dirty Dancing remake because I’m not *that* much of a glutton for punishment)

Image is a picture of Linda Hamilton & Ron Pearlman from the 1987 version of Beauty and the Beast

Though I’m currently spending a lot of time watching this, so I’m not quite sure if you should trust my judgment 🙂

Interlude

The past two weeks have been…a lot…which is perhaps putting it mildly. I find it a little bit difficult to concentrate on any of the things I’m supposed to be concentrating on (research, writing, teaching, etc) when the current state of the world is basically

dumpsterfire-600x356

Dumpster Fire

Nevertheless, we carry on. It helps to have truly supportive friends and family. I know I’m not alone in what I’m feeling, and most of the folks I know are out in these streets (literally) trying to make the world better. That gives me strength. My students give me motivation. My research gives me peace (this may be a weird thing to say, but I research TV, and there are few things I enjoy more than being able to spend quality time with my TV). I’ve also been reading a lot more this semester. I try to get in at least 5 hours per week. All of this reading is outside of whatever reading I’m doing for teaching and research (though some of it is academic in nature). I’m currently working on Ibram X. Kendi’s Stamped from the Beginning: The Definitive History of Racist Ideas in America, which is a heavy read (both literally and figuratively) but also a great read and extremely informative.

I guess I don’t have a lot to say about teaching today. The class is still going well. I love hearing my students’ ideas and responses in relation to the documentaries we’re watching. Last week, for example, we had an expansive conversation on the heels of watching The Black Power Mixtape, 1967-1975, and it seemed like the documentary really spoke to some of them (perhaps more than some of the other documentaries we’ve watched this semester). Some of them expressed to me how much they didn’t know about the subject before watching, which wasn’t necessarily surprising to me and which also reaffirmed my confidence in the films I’ve selected for the rest of the semester.

On the upside of everything, it’s Friday, and ya gotta get down on Friday, right? (shout out to Rebecca Black)

P.S. By “get down,” I mostly mean sleep.

Step By Step

One of the readings my students had to complete this week was the introduction to Tonny Krijnen and Sofie Van Bauwel’s Gender and Media: Representing, Producing, Consuming. I assigned this reading served a couple different purposes. For one thing, given that I’m teaching a documentary class, I want them to be thinking about how media works, how it influences culture and is influenced by culture, etc. Additionally, one of the questions that we’re grappling with this semester is “What does it mean to represent?” In any media class that I’m teaching, this would always be a point of interest, but for this particular class, given the documentary’s general presumed status as “authentic,” “true,” and “real,” it’s a question that I want them to really take into consideration.

The other purpose that I had in choosing this reading is also tied to the issue of representation. My section of this course is focused on Crime, Justice, and Power, and as such, the documentaries that we’re viewing are often dealing with pretty heavy issues. As we’re grappling with those issues, I want them to consider who and/or what is being represented, how they’re being represented, what affects those representations, etc. Gender is one of the many spheres in which we’ll be considering these matters. And thus, this reading, which is only about 10 pages long, provided them with an accessible crash course in the theory and history of gender studies with a few relevant examples.

I’m always a little bit wary of how things like this are going to go over, especially in classes that aren’t marked as like CLASS ABOUT GENDER. Despite the trepidation, I’ve been lucky enough to have positive results in most cases, and this time was one of those positive experiences. Along with completing the reading, students also had to turn in what I call “Critical Reading Responses.” They only have to do this for a handful of readings in this class (from a student perspective, I always found it weary and tedious when we had to write a response paper for every single reading, and I do not wish to inflict that upon myself or my students). I pulled from several different response essay assignments that I saw on the internet in creating the assignment. The gist is that they’re reading closely and carefully and then writing a responses that clearly demonstrates their understanding of the text and ability to analyze while including some key components, such as a quote that stood out to them, a new concept that they were introduced to in the reading, etc.

Thus far, they’ve only done this assignment once, so I can’t speak to how well it will always work, but I was really pleased by what they turned in for this reading. They conveyed a willingness to engage with the material in ways that might not always be expected. Additionally, they were very forthcoming about their familiarity (or lack thereof) with the material. Despite what folks might think about the internet making all of these topics common knowledge, I found that many of my students expressed unfamiliarity with the ideas that gender and sex are different, that gender is a continuum, that gender is performative, etc. But even though they were unfamiliar, they were open to learning and intrigued by the prospects. And even when they sometimes expressed disagreement with certain points from the reading, they were still pretty open to the possibilities.

Now I pretty much always think my students are the best students in the world because I’m highkey biased, but I don’t think they’re unicorns. I think that we can bring new and important concepts to students and have them be received. I also think that sometimes these things will fall flat, and we have to know that, to quote Pink, “Sometimes it be’s like that” (shout out to the year 2000). But we keep trying because it’s important, and I don’t think there’s been a day in recent memory that crystallized that more clearly for me than today. As Maya Angelou would advise, I know better, so I’m doing better, and I hope you all are too ✌🏾

(P.S. If you read the title of this entry, and started singing the Step by Step theme song, we should probably be best friends)